It’s all about what may or may not happen. My mind is constantly up and about things that probably don’t need to be thought through. When I leave for college in the morning, I’m dreaming about what will happen during the day. I’m probably visualizing the events that will occur. All throughout the day, when I’m in college, during lectures the number one distraction is the thought of the things to come. I’m anticipating a lot. I’m anxious to know what will happen.
On my way back home, I’m thinking about what I could have done right and what I did well. Some things need correction and some things need to be done again. I don’t know about you, but my thoughts are filled with ‘what would have been’ and ‘what may happen’.
I look back at my scores and all of a sudden I feel incompetent. My morale goes low. I look forward and set my goal to being the best in class, and all of a sudden it seems like a towering hurdle, one that I can’t get over. Taking a view at these extremes neither encourages me, nor does it help me keep the faith.
So, finally, all I have is the present. To quote a blog I read by Gail Hyatt, “I am trying to remember that the present moment is the only place where I can encounter the living God. I want to walk with him, moment by moment, day by day. I want to abide with him and He with me. I want Him to lead me. I want to be found faithful. I can’t do that yesterday, and tomorrow is no guarantee. It’s only possible right now.”
“There is no point in regretting any part of the past. The past can’t now be altered, the future has yet to be lived, and consciously to experience every moment of the present is the only way to gain at least the illusion of immortality.” P. D. James, Time to Be in Earnest: A Fragment of Autobiography
And scripture, (the bible) has this to say : Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
So where are you living right now?