Where I am and where I want to be.

Why do I bother asking myself that question? Judging by the number of times it has already changed, I don’t know when I will get a positive and affirmative answer. In my quest to answer it, I began asking other friends of what they wanted to be. Got many different answers and one of them that ticked me off the most was ”I’ll see when I grow up!”. Well ok, its your life but how can you not be concerned now about your future? Isn’t it important As a kid, I wanted to do many things. I wanted to be a pilot first of all since my dad had brought me a ‘A’ volume World Book and the ‘Airplane’ section really awed me. I dreamt of being a pilot and flying high among the clouds. I also dream of being the savior to a few hundred souls by maneuvering the aircraft properly on to the runway during a storm. My dream plane crashed when I heard that my optical number and glasses wouldn’t deem me fit to fly since I couldn’t see far of things that well. Another of my dream took me to wanting to be an engineer. But I canned that idea as soon as I realized how bad at math I was and that the main part of engineering was math. That was around the time when I finished the 10th grade. I had plenty of ambitions till then and all of them were systematically chucked out due to logical reasoning.

In the 12th grade I had this burning passion to be a doctor. I went all out for it and joined coaching classes that specialized in PCB i.e Physics, Chemistry and Biology which was a required specialization to give the Maharashtra Common Entrance Test for medicine. Well, while studying so hard for that I forgot to pay attention to math that was also required to attain a cumulative average and m total percentage went down. A year of studying had achieved dismal results. It was good enough for my entrance test though, and when I sat for it bio was totally amazing. Chemistry didn’t give me much trouble. But along came Electro-physics. Electro-magnetism formulae, magnetic flux formulae, along with principles of Dia, Para and Ferro magnetism hit me again and again on the head like Brett Lee hits a novice batsman with bouncers. I was run out, literally! 10 minutes to the bell and I realized that I would not be able to complete those answers, and I marked ‘c’ for nearly 20 questions assuring me 5 marks at least by way of probability.

Before my CET results were out I knew what it’d be, I had no hope of getting in that year. Could I try again next year? Yes! but I went through so much heart-burn in that previous year studying, cutting off relations with friends among other sacrifices, that I didn’t want to ever have to do anything with science as study again. Again I was stuck with the same question.. who will I be and what graduation course should I take to become that?

While gloomily chatting with my classmate on Orkut, he told me that he was trying for a different course, a non-science stream – BMS. Like in my life there were many people who helped me make a career decision.. my parents, my elders.. and then there was a friend named Jude. What was BMS then to me? It was a pre-MBA course that could get me to become a manager. Manager….hmm. The thought of being in a position higher than other employees seemed very appealing. So that’s where I’m after two years nearly. Just another year to go to become a graduate.

What will life bring to me after this? What job will I take? Will I be a super successful entrepreneur or someone who has a lot of power? Or will I be humbled anytime by the Lord in the near future? 😀 I look forward now, hoping that whatever I do will lead me to becoming who I want to be.

Keep reading this blog to see how this guy turns out! See you ’round!


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